It Was Always You
by l0velyfe
Summary: The story of Gin and Rangiku's life together, from the day they met to Gin's death. Behind the scenes of the anime, their love lays hidden. A story that truly shows the development of their relationship. Rated M for sexual content beginning in ch4.
1. Prologue

**It Was Always You**

_Written by Illuminate the Shadows_

**_Prologue_**

* * *

**_Year 196_**

_It was a cool night, stars glistening overhead. The branches of the sakura trees that bowed over the garden waved in the breeze, releasing petals that twirled to land in the pond beneath. The moon was round and swollen in the sky. Ominous._

_She stood on the wooden deck outside of the barracks, alone – or, she felt alone. Not even one of the hundreds of shinigami in Seireitei could understand her past, her feelings, the decisions she had made. Nor could they comprehend the consequences and devastation that came with such decisions. True, some of the happenings had been out of her control. His decision had been out of her control. He had been determined. But she could have made the decision to let him leave her life. Many shinigami here would call it betrayal. They would say she was disloyal. But she wouldn't take back any of it._

_She smoothed a hand down her silky kimono to her abdomen. Everything was different now. She had matured greatly in the past year. Her life no longer revolved around drinking sake and luring unsuspecting men into her clutches. The war had changed her. Haineko would definitely enjoy teasing her now. She felt the cat stir within her – at least, she was fairly certain that was her zanpakuto. A sigh escaped from between her pink lips. There wasn't much left for her now. She had lost her best friend. _

_Her fingers clutched at the material covering her swollen navel. Her voice was but a whisper._

"_But his spirit will live on in you."_


	2. Rukongai Series

_Hello readers! I decided to address you here, after the prologue._

_This is my newest piece of work; a GinRan fanfic!_  
_I just love this pairing so much. I love that they were best friends for so long._  
_So that's why I decided to write my fanfiction from the beginning._

_As you will notice as this fanfiction goes on, it is not written in chapter format._  
_After the prologue, each "chapter" is a series of stories from a certain portion_  
_of their life. Each portion has a title and date. The dates do not jump from past to_  
_future to past. They are in chronological order._

_There are five portions in this particular series, the **Rukongai **series, from_  
_when Gin and Rangiku were just children. It begins with year 0, because_  
_Rangiku only started counting when she met Gin :D I also included the age_  
_that Gin and Rangiku appear at the time, because they age more slowly than_  
_the years that pass!_

_I'll shut up and let you enjoy now! I do not own Bleach or any of its characters!_  
_Please review and let me know what you think!_

* * *

**It Was Always You**

_Written by Illuminate the Shadows_

_**Rukongai Series**_

* * *

**The Beginning**_**  
September 29th, Year 0  
Gin appears to be 7  
Rangiku appears to be 6**_

His young eyes had taken in more than he cared to see. He watched people fight for shelter, babies left alone in allies to die, and people starving every day in Rukongai. Even he, himself, sometimes starved for days when he could not find food. And when he saw those people fighting, he turned and went the other way. When he saw the babies crying in their baskets, he kept on walking. So why, he asked himself, didn't he keep walking when he saw her? Why did he change direction and walk down the hill to stop beside her collapsed figure?

He held out a piece of fruit. She stared at it for a long time, life slowly flooding back into her blue-gray eyes. "Yer hungry right? If yer hungry, then ya must have spiritual energy."

She sat up weakly and took the persimmon. Her hands were shaking. "I guess so." She took a bite, and then another. "You too?" He nodded, sitting down beside her as she finished the fruit. She had short ginger hair that framed her face. Her clothes were dirty and ragged; no different from his. She must be no older than him.

"Better?"

She nodded. "Thank you..."

"What's yer name?"

"Rangiku," she murmured, gazing at him curiously. His eyes were so squinted that she couldn't even tell what color they were. "I'm Rangiku."

"Rangiku. I'm Gin."

"Gin?" He nodded. "Gin." She wrinkled her little nose.

"What's wrong?"

"That's such a weird name!"

* * *

**Just Like You  
**_**May 3**__**rd, Year 8**__**  
Gin appears to be 8  
Rangiku appears to be 7**_

"Gin!" Her small feet stirred up dust as she ran after him. "Gin!" He halted, and she stopped too. He didn't turn around. "... Gin? Look what I found." Discreetly, he wiped the blood from his hand on the inside of his kimono before he turned around. A mischievous grin curved his lips.

"Look'it tha snake." He touched the little scaly creature upon Rangiku's palms. A forked tongue darted out to taste the air. Gin's smirk disappeared. "Ya oughta put 'im down, Ran. He migh' be poisonous."

The girl cringed and gently set the snake amongst the grass where it slithered away. "I didn't think about that." She raised her head to find that her own snake had also slithered away. "... Gin?"

"Over here."

Rangiku pushed her way through the undergrowth, stumbling on a tree root sticking out of the ground, and came upon Gin crouching by a patch of flowers. "What are you doing...?"

"Shh." Curiously, the girl kneeled beside him. A pink butterfly clung to Gin's index finger, wings fluttering in the breeze. Rangiku watched in awe. She had never seen Gin in such a gentle state.

"Yer snake was like me, so I figured I'd find somethin' tha' reminded me'a you."

Her lips curved into a small smile.

* * *

**Stormy Nights  
**_**August 8**__**th, Year 14**__**  
Gin appears to be 10  
Rangiku appears to be 9**_

"It's gonna storm t'night," Gin murmured as he unceremoniously dropped the firewood into the pile. "We'll havta go ta the shelter."

"It's always crowded there."

"Do ya wanna sit in tha rain an' cold all nigh'?" The ginger-haired girl shook her head, hugging her knees to her chest. "Then come on." He held out a hand. She took it, and she didn't let go until they had walked the eleven blocks and arrived at the shelter. Sometimes adults would be refused when it was overcrowded, but they always let children in. Gin found a corner they could sit in and wait it out.

The roof was old and beginning to leak. But it was better than no roof. More and more people began to loiter within the crowded shelter, but no one bothered them. Hell, even these people didn't have the hearts to kick two kids out of their corner.

Rangiku clung to his arm for the long span of time that came between their arrival and the handing out of food. She ate the bread and rice they were given. But the moment the very first flash of light lit the room through the window, she buried her face in his shoulder. Her entire body shook as the thunder cracked overhead.

"Shh, s'okay Rangiku," he mumbled, touching her wrist. The young girl whimpered softly and crawled into his lap. Wrapping his arms around her, he listened to the wordless murmur of the people and the pitter-patter of the rain outside. He felt her tense on his lap with each rumble of thunder. He had quickly learned that Rangiku was afraid of thunderstorms, although he didn't quite understand why. To him, they were majestic.

"Rangiku, when's yer birthday?" he murmured into her ear in an attempt to distract her. The technique usually worked.

"I-I don't know," she whispered softly. "I don't k-know how long I was in Rukongai before... I mean, I didn't start counting the days until I met you." Her small hand clutched at the fabric above his heart as another clap of thunder unsettled the night air.

"How 'bout this," he murmured quickly, desperate the take her mind off her fear before she began to cry. Tears were already welling up in her eyes. He hated it when she cried. "How 'bout we make yer birthday the day we met? Since ya only started countin' then?"

She blinked once, causing a tear to trace down her cheek as she smiled faintly. "Okay." Gin reached up to wipe the tear away with his thumb.

"Dun' cry. It'll go away."

And when morning rolled in, the thunder was gone, just as he had promised. Only, Rangiku wasn't awake to notice. So an exhausted little boy could be seen carrying a small, sleeping girl on his back eleven blocks to their makeshift home.

* * *

**Promises  
**_**June 16**__**th, Year 22**__**  
Gin appears to be 12  
Rangiku appears to be 11**_

"They move so perfect. Like water. Or maybe like air."

The silver-haired boy's smirk stretched across his face. "Ah, tha's just somethin' ya'd say, Ran." He leaned back, hands flat on the grass and legs outstretched. Rangiku lay beside him on her belly, watching the students of the academy train in the field. During the summer months, they trained outside a lot. Rangiku liked to come watch them from their hidden spot beneath the oak tree.

"Don't you think it's cool?"

"I guess," he replied halfheartedly, shrugging his shoulders for emphasis. Rangiku shot him a look that nearly made him feel guilty.

"Well I think it's cool."

"Jeez Ran, ya sound like ya wanna join 'em..."

"Too much violence for me. I don't really like fighting. It's really dangerous."

"Ya could always be on'a those healin' shinigami."

Rangiku turned to look at him oddly, and he immediately wanted to take those words back. "How do you know that?"

He calmly shrugged his shoulders again. "If they figh' all tha time, then they gotta have someone ta heal 'em, stupid."

Rangiku wrinkled her nose – something that Gin always found cute. "You're the stupid one! I bet they all can heal. They all learn how to fight, don't they?"

Gin kept his mouth shut this time; it was a rhetorical question anyway. "Want some more persimmons?" The ginger-haired girl eagerly took one from the handkerchief he had wrapped them up in, munching on it as they watched the shinigami begin to practice kidou. It was quiet for a long time, the sound of the birds' chirping above breaking the silence every so often. Rangiku didn't find the silence awkward or uncomfortable. She and Gin sat in silence together quite often. Sometimes back to back, sometimes side by side. When they didn't have anything to say, they still enjoyed each other's presence.

"Gin?"

"Mn?"

"Where did you go last night?"

Silence found its way between them again. He felt her icy blue eyes on him. Sad, yet curious. Betrayed, yet intrigued. Accusing. He couldn't lie to her.

"Ah, I can' tell ya tha', Ran-chan. At least, not yet."

Her eyebrows furrowed. "That's not an answer."

"I'd rather tell ya tha' than lie ta ya, Ran."

Rangiku looked down at the blades of grass threading between her fingers. She didn't want to look at him, just in case she could see his eyes. He always used them to his advantage, and they almost always made her give in. But, at the same time, they made her feel special. No one else saw them, as if they were reserved for her.

"I don't like it when you keep secrets from me," she mumbled to the daisy poking up through the grass. "I don't like it when you leave because I don't know when you'll come back."

"Awh, but I always _do_ come back, righ'?" She nodded and shrugged. He hated keeping secrets too, but it was for her. He had to do it. "Listen, Ran." He waited until she raised her eyes to look at him. "I can't tell ya now, but someday ya'll know. And every time I leave, I'll always come back ta ya."

A small sniffle, then she smiled faintly. "Promise?"

Slits of diamond blue gazed at her evenly, and he held out his pinky. She reached out to twine her smaller finger with his.

"I promise."

* * *

**Change  
**_**December 23**__**rd, Year 28**__**  
Gin appears to be 13  
Rangiku appears to be 12**_

Winter was settling in. Rukongai always got quite cold in the winter. She thought it very lucky that they had found an abandoned shed in the outskirts of downtown before it had begun to snow. Bending over to pick up a branch from the forest floor, she scowled to herself. It was more along the lines of Gin helping her clear out the old junk left behind in the shed, the disappearing like the wind for nearly two months. She had been finding her own food and gathering firewood alone every day. But she knew he would come back. He would come back and she would yell at him for just leaving suddenly and reappearing whenever he pleased. He would say he was sorry, and she would ignore him for a few days. But, she would forgive him. She always did.

Tucking the branch into her basket of firewood she'd been gathering all morning, she continued on along the forest path, bare feet padding lightly on dirt. She would have to find fabric to make shoes so their feet wouldn't freeze when they had to go search for food in the snow. Maybe he would come back today. She really didn't mind living alone; she was independent and could take care of herself when she needed to. And although she got a bit lonely sometimes, there was a stray cat that kept her company. What bothered her most was sleeping alone. She didn't like the emptiness beside her and the silence where the sound of his even breathing should be.

A figure ahead of her caught her attention. Crossing her path, the robed person walked quickly. She recognized that walk.

"Gin...?" She dropped the basket. "Gin!" Her feet hit the ground as she ran after the boy. "Oi, Gin!"

Finally, he stopped. Rangiku came to a halt a few yards behind him, glaring. "Baka, why did you make me call your name three times?" No reply. Looking him over, the girl took notice of his clothes. "... Are those shinigami robes? Where'd you get those?"

Gin turned his head partially to the side, and suddenly, Rangiku felt scared. Scared of what he was going to say? Scared of the specks of blood split on his cheek? Scared of _him_?

"Gin, what's going on?" He hated the apprehension in her voice, as if he was a monster. Perhaps he was. Perhaps it would be better this way. Part of him still clung to the hope that she would not follow him.

"I'm gonna become a shinigami, Ran."

She was quiet for a moment. "... Why would you do that?"

"So ya don' havta cry anymore. I'm gonna change things. I'm gonna make it so ya have no reason ta cry."

He felt her eyes on his back, staring, frightened. He wondered if he was as frightened as her. There was another long pause before she spoke. "Then I'm coming with you."

He turned around slowly. There was determination in her eyes. She was still the same stubborn girl he'd met decades ago. "Tha's just like ya, Ran-chan."

Truthfully, part of him was relieved. He wasn't sure he was ready to be without her just yet.


	3. Academy Series

_Hi readers, I'm back with the second series; the **Academy **series!_

_In this series, there are four short portions. It is not quite as long as_  
_the first series. In the final two portions of this series, Gin is a lieutenant,_  
_but Rangiku is still in the academy. I attempted to get the years of Rangiku's_  
_friends correct (i.e. Renji, Kira, Ikkaku, Shūhei, etc.), directly below._

_**(If you really don't care, skip all this lol)  
**Long story short, my reasoning is that Shūhei is in the same year as Gin and_  
_Rangiku, because when Gin saved him as a lieutenant, Shūhei was in his final_  
_year. When Shūhei was in his final year, Kira and Renji were in their first year._  
_Therefore, Renji and Kira are 6 years behind Gin and Rangiku._  
_Also, since there is no specification of when Yumichika and Ikkaku were in_  
_the academy, I just put them as 3 or so years behind Gin, Shūhei and Rangiku_  
_(and 3 or so years ahead of Renji and Kira)._

_Anyway, I'll let you enjoy this series! I don't own Bleach!_  
_[The M-rating will go into effect in the fourth series -_  
_so not the next, but the one after that]_

* * *

**It Was Always You**

_Written by Illuminate the Shadows_

**_Academy Series_**

* * *

**Sweet Dreams**_**  
January 3**__**rd**__**  
Year 30**_

The soft sound of breathing filled her ears, echoing within the quiet room. Not too long ago, she found it hard to sleep in silence. Breathing comforted her; lulled her to sleep. But this was not Gin's breathing. Nine other female students slept soundly around her, curled up on their own futons. And Rangiku couldn't even begin to fathom sleep.

It was her first night sleeping in the quarters made for students. She had stayed with Gin in a makeshift hotel for the first three nights in Seireitei. The first day of classes had consisted of simple lectures pertaining to the zanpakuto. The shinigami's source of power. Rangiku found it odd and slightly unnerving that another being lived within her. Perhaps she could blame any impulsive actions on her. Not the Rangiku knew if her zanpakuto was male or female. She simply guessed that it was a female. Yamamoto, the head captain of the shinigami himself, had spoken to them directly. Rangiku couldn't believe how old he was. There were rumors going around the freshmen group that he was over 1,000 years old.

She couldn't wait to learn its name. What it could do. What it looked like. Yamamoto had said it would likely be impossible to know anything about it now, but Rangiku had a feeling hers was female.

She mused over her zanpakuto for what felt like another hour until she was desperate for sleep. Tomorrow would begin her training, and she was exhausted. Rolling onto her side, she heaved a sigh.

Something lightly brushed the fabric on her back, and before she could decide whether to dismiss it or confront it, an arm had slipped around her waist and a hand over her mouth. She tried to wriggle out of the grasp.

"Shh, don' scream, Ran. S'me."

Immediately, she froze. His warmth seeped through her robe. He let go of her mouth. "Gin? What are you doing here? You can't be in here..."

"I know how much ya hate sleepin' without me," he whispered against her ear. "An' I was havin' problems sleepin' too."

"But you'll get in trouble..."

"I'll sneak back b'fore dawn."

She sighed, allowing herself to relax in his embrace. Usually her stubbornness could rival his, but she was just too tired. But she was glad he was with her. She wasn't sure she would be able to get through all this without him.

"Sweet dreams, Ran-chan," he murmured, arm draped over her hip lazily.

Then again, she wouldn't even be in Seireitei if it weren't for him.

* * *

**Snakes  
**_**March 7**__**th**__**  
Year 31**_

"Don't go easy on me, Gin!"

The strawberry blonde smirked at the man standing across the field from her. Their instructor stood a few yards away, joined by the five other students in their class. A gentle breeze drifted through the very meadow where Gin and Rangiku had once watched shinigami train two decades ago. Now they stood in their shoes.

Wordlessly, the silver-haired man shifted into an athletic stance. "You may use any form of hakuda against your opponent. Sparring only. No Kidō and no Hohō."

Rangiku narrowed her eyes. Gin did not move. She realized that she would have to strike first, or their sparring would get nowhere. Running toward him, she jabbed at his midsection with straightened fingers. He turned to the side and dodged, but she hadn't expected fingertips to connect. A series of punches, chops and jabs were exchanged, in which Rangiku administered the majority. "Ichimaru-san, don't hold back!" their instructor yelled through cupped hands. Jumping backwards to avoid yet another strike, Gin made a frustrated face and turned his head toward him.

"I'm no–" A foot connected with the side of his head and he fell to the ground with a grunt. Dust flew from the dirt of the training grounds.

"Well done, Rangiku!" The spectators applauded politely, but Rangiku didn't bask in her glory. She stooped over to hold out a hand, which Gin took. He stood, brushing his hakama off, and grinned at her.

"Maybe yer tha snake, Ran."

And from that very day, Gin continued on to improve rapidly in everything taught at Shinō Academy, except hakuda. During Rangiku's 2nd year in the academy, Gin had already graduated and taken the position of lieutenant of the 5th Division. And Rangiku could still beat him in hand-to-hand combat any day.

**Sparks  
**_**December 31**__**st**__**  
Year 35**_

"Lieutenant, eh? That's a lot of responsibility for someone straight outta the academy."

"Knock it off, Ikkaku-san." Kira glared at him. "The man's a genius. He graduated in just one year! They obviously wouldn't have put him there if he didn't have the ability."

Rangiku rolled her eyes at the other mens' comments. Ikkaku and Kira continued to banter. Renji minded his own business. She leaned over to Gin as they continued down the sidewalk. "Sorry about them. Ikkaku's probably just jealous."

It was the middle of winter, and Rangiku was beginning her 6th and final year at the academy tomorrow. Although she was excited to graduate, she was also apprehensive. She hoped to be placed in the Gotei 13. Maybe she would even go into the 5th Division with Gin. Ikkaku and Kira were relatively "new" friends, Kira and Renji being incoming freshmen and Ikkaku a third-year. Both Kira and Ikkaku were very interested in Rangiku's friendship with the famous Gin Ichimaru. Although, Kira was more awestruck and Ikkaku more... Annoyed. Gin had been a lieutenant for a full three years now, under Captain Aizen Sōsuke of the 5th Division.

The silver-haired man smirked. "S'alrigh'. They're jus' curious."

"Let's go up on this hill," Kira pointed, trotting through the grass. Renji and Ikkaku followed, while Gin and Rangiku brought up the rear.

Humans were quite fond of celebrating New Years, as were shinigami. Although, Kira spoke of something called "fireworks" that she had never seen in Seireitei. From what Rangiku understood, they were similar to the light that kidō caused when cast. Somehow, Gin and Rangiku had been convinced to tag along to see these fireworks. The hard part had been getting permission to go to the human world when the four of them were only academy students. After considering the fact that there had been no hollow activity in that area for months, Yamamoto agreed to let them go for the night, granted that they would had a lieutenant-level shinigami with them.

"Ya cold, Ran?"

Blinking, she turned to look at his fingers as they traced her skin where goosebumps had risen. Before she could answer, he had scooted closer to her. She remembered the nights when she used to sit in his lap when it stormed outside. She still didn't like thunder.

A sudden explosion of light broke her from her reverie, and for a short moment, she thought they were under attack. Another burst of light exploded in the shy, blue this time. The streams of light fell from the blast like rain droplets. Were these fireworks? She watched in awe as many other colors and shapes erupted in the night sky.

After a few minutes, she turned her head to ask Gin if he had ever seen anything like this. He was much closer to her than she had expected, and their noses just barely brushed. All attention now transferred from the colorful fireworks to her, Gin hesitated only a second. That was all he needed.

His lips were soft, like rose petals, and they moved gently and fluidly against hers. He smelt musky – almost woodsy.

It was over as suddenly as it had begun. Fireworks continued to spark in the sky, lighting his eyes different colors. And yet again, she felt special. His eyes were only for her. She couldn't imagine anything more cliché; actual sparks flying during their first kiss. But it felt right. Real. And while Rangiku wasn't one to swoon like a lovesick schoolgirl, she knew she had felt something.

The silence was comfortable, like always. She spent the rest of the night wrapped up in his arms, just like when she was a kid. Nothing had changed.

* * *

**The Morning After  
**_**March 28th  
Year 36**_

The first sense that was awakened was scent. She could smell something slightly musky, which she immediately identified as Gin's scent without difficulty. That was good. If Gin was with her, she was safe from harm.

The second sense was interrupted by an overwhelming wave of nausea. Jumping up – where had she even been laying? – her other senses were forced to come to consciousness. The brightness shining in through the window, the sound of birds singing outside, the wooden floor beneath her bare feet as she ran down the hall and the revolting taste of bile in her throat. Upon entering the bathroom, she fell to her knees and vomited into the toilet.

"Ya really shouldn' drink so much, Ran," Gin murmured, holding her hair back from her face. She winced and took the towel he offered her. At this point, he had seen her sick so many times that she shouldn't feel embarrassed. He was certainly the only man to see her at her worst. She wiped her mouth gingerly. Now she remembered. The previous night had been Kira's birthday. A few of them – Renji, Shūhei, Ikkaku, Yumichika herself and a hesitant Gin – had spent the evening playing stupid drinking games and the Gods knew what else. She couldn't really recall anything after 9pm. Actually, where was she? This wasn't her room. Had she gone back to Gin's room in her drunken stupor? She turned to look at him, mouth still covered by the towel, but he spoke before she did.

"Ya couldn' even walk back ta yer quarters, so I helped ya ta mine. I figured ya wouldn' mind stayin' here, since it was so late and yer barracks were so far."

She blinked, and shook her head. "No, that's okay. I was just wondering..."

"Ya passed out as soon as we got here. I took it upon m'self ta read some books." She smiled faintly. "Ya alrigh' now?" She nodded, and he bent to gently gather her in his arms. Gin's strength surprised her sometimes. He set her down on the couch in the rather large, main room of his quarters. "'M gonna getcha a glass'a water. Jus' stay here, 'kay?" He disappeared, leaving her alone to hug her knees on the plush couch.

What in the hell would she do without him.


End file.
